Shame, embarrassment, guilt, sadness. They make my heart heavy. They bring tears to my eyes.
...when someone close to me says, 'when will people start doing something!'
...because choosing flight travel doesn't align with the need and importance to live a more sustainable way.
...at knowing that these planet-damaging flights are for self-indulgent purposes.
...at recognizing the privilege to travel like this.
...at thinking about how I will feel and what I will think about my choices at a time of climate emergency, in the future.
...because choosing flight travel doesn't align with the need and importance to live a more sustainable way.
...at knowing that these planet-damaging flights are for self-indulgent purposes.
...at recognizing the privilege to travel like this.
...at thinking about how I will feel and what I will think about my choices at a time of climate emergency, in the future.
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| Decisions in light of the Climate Crisis: the emotional barriers |
The context: Age 25, I packed in the norm and went to discover...
At turning 25, I saw ahead an exciting 5 year window to seek out adventures, new experiences and opportunities without attachments and responsibilities. I decided to leave my job (2 years in sustainability), my independent London living and the close proximity to my wonderful boyfriend, to move back with my parents and use it as a base to embark upon times of discovery, exploration and personal growth. Some said I was brave. In the same week, it would feel like the best decision I've made and the worst!
Before I quit, I decided I would take a 3 month trip to Central America and that was what I told everyone! Having that goal and reason, helped me to quit.
However, I struggled to choose a destination. I procrastinated research and buying a flight. The idea didn't excite me and felt daunting and difficult.
Evidently, there were bigger underlying issues here.
I 'postponed' the trip until after Christmas and what relief that was! Instead, I planned a week long solo walking trip around the tip of the UK from Helford to St Ives and headed out into nature by myself.
But I was soon back and looking ahead with the question of 'what next?'. Man...that question!
Since then wonderful opportunities and interesting ideas have emerged. I'm taking a few days in Stockholm with my boyfriend; next summer I will visit the beneficiaries of a charity close to my heart in Tanzania; and I could possibly spend 3 months in Nepal trekking and volunteering.
With all these plans comes flights and carbon emissions. In context, the average UK citizen uses 12 tons of CO₂e each year. Scarily, we need to reduce our carbon emissions to 3 tons per person per year in the UK to have an 80% chance of staying below the 2°C global temperature change. An 80% chance. 2°C, not even 1.5°C. That's a heavy bit of information to digest.²
Together these three journeys to Stockholm, Tanzania and Nepal come to 5.13 tons of CO₂e¹. This is more than what we need to reduce to in order to stay within 2°C. And I haven't yet considered the carbon emissions of me just living: eating, staying warm, having light, charging my phone and laptop, travelling to see friends or family. It all has a carbon footprint!
The emotional push and pull in decision-making
These opportunities are wonderful, once in a lifetime gifts. Yet on a daily basis, I'm reminded of how my decisions will contribute to having devastating effects of the planet and societies, on us.
This brings up the emotions I listed earlier: shame, guilt, embarrassment and sadness. Combined, and in moments when I'm truly listening to them, they're strong. So strong: they're massive hunking walls which stop me from pursuing my ideas. They leave me deflated and demoralised, scrounging around elsewhere for other ideas.
Sometimes, I see over these emotions but they inevitably come back and I'm stuck, again. Questioning my moral compass and integrity.
I don't want to look back and regret.
Who else feels this push and pull?! What do you do?!
Do you decide to hush the moral voice to choose adventure, ease or pleasure?
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| Photo by Vladislav Babienko on Unsplash |
Or do you listen to it?
Do you seek the uncertainty knowing that it is the 'right' thing to do for the planet?
The Climate Crisis is an emotional topic
From a simplistic view, the Climate Emergency is a practical issue with practical solutions.
However, combine the intensity of the emergency and the devastating and upsetting consequences of climate change which are happening now, with the urgent and global-scale systemic changes needed and it is an issue tied up in emotions. The passion behind Extinction Rebellion, Greta Thunberg's speeches and the Youth Strikes she has catalysed, the Birth Striker movement, the appearance of Eco-Psychology - there's no denying that the Climate Crisis is an emotional topic. The question is how we make decisions and when we choose to listen to our emotions or not.
I hope this blog post has resonated with other people who feel the emotional tug when making decisions in the light of a climate crisis. Emotions are helpful and powerful, they can be the fire to make us act. For me at the moment though, they're big walls which I'm staring up at, stuck, wondering if I should knock them down to go ahead or turn around and find an alternative route.
If you've enjoyed this, please share thoughts and comments and advice below!
Resources
¹Calculated using ClimateCare.org. London-Kathmandu return flight via Dubai = 2.57 tons. London-Kilimanjaro return = 2.11 tons. London-Stockholm return = 0.45 tons. Total = 5.13 tons.
²Dr Parkinson, 2014, SGR: Responsible Science, Living within environmental limits: From science to practice. https://www.sgr.org.uk/resources/what-does-sustainable-living-look
Thank you for this. It’s nice to know that other people also feel trapped because of their choices impacting the environment. It’s a really tricky decision as you cannot argue with the science, which makes it seem unjustified to fly. However, it sounds like you are going to be contributing to the good of the environment and people for most of your travels, which means that you will be making a difference. The person you will become from your travels may enable you to view the climate crisis in a more profound way. You could also make up your C02 by not flying over the next few years when you get back home. Xx
ReplyDeleteHi Lizzie, thanks for your comment. :)
ReplyDeleteI think many people who are conscious and concerned about climate change do feel this trap but I think it is an unspoken area. Inevitably the answer is that we fly less and avoid some of those trips we want to take but this is not the easy answer which we want to hear and hence it's an avoided topic. Yet talking about it is helpful to know we're not alone. So I equally appreciate your comment!
I appreciate what you say about contributing to positive projects through my travels and whilst this doesn't make up or offset the carbon, it is a positive to come from a negative.
Your point on cutting my flying over the next few years is an interesting one and perhaps we should look at our flying habits over longer periods - like 10 years - rather than each year.
Quick calculation: London-Lisbon return flight = 0.49 tons CO2. Once a year for 5 years = 2.45tons. London-Kathmandu return flight = 2.47tons.
So I could decide not to fly for the next 5 years...though being honest with myself that feels a large and challenging commitment to make.
An interesting article on this topic of fly-less instead of 'don't fly at all' : https://www.theguardian.com/travel/2019/jan/26/why-i-only-take-one-holiday-flight-a-year-climate-change